Saturday, May 14, 2011

Yosemite Sam To Oppose Burton in 2012

Looney Tunes character Yosemite Sam announced Friday at a news conference that he is running for Congress as a primary challenger for veteran legislator, Dan Burton. Sam previously ran for Sheriff of Marion County.

I happened to be at the news conference, which took place in my imagination, and I asked Sam why he was running against Burton. With smoke trailing from his ears, Sam said, "Ooooooh that Dan Burton makes me soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo MAD!"

Sam didn't take too many questions before jumping into his pickup truck (complete with his signature "back off" bumper sticker) and speeding off leaving the media covered in dust. Campaign Volunteer Coordinator Wile E. Coyote gave us all Acme wipes to clean off the dust. But, he had to go. The Roadrunner ran by about that time. He took two steps and knocked himself out by running into an Acme pole (the Roadrunner had erected).

It should be an interesting race. With the new Looney Tunes on the air, though, it does raise questions about equal time.

The Burton campaign was quick to respond. They released this clip from the new Looney Tunes show and questioned his ability to serve with such an anger management problem.

Sam's campaign manager, Foghorn Leghorn, responded strongly, "I say...I say...Burton is just concerned for his job, son. Anyone can see that. He's been up there for what, 50 years? That's a joke, I say, that's a joke, son."

Sources say that Burton's campaign may be looking at the Barnyard Dog to manage his campaign in 2012. That's unconfirmed.

I will follow this story until I'm out of ideas. As always, Indy Democrat brings you the latest in fake news and information. Especially on Saturdays.

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